Something for Worship Leaders

 Considering how often the choruses and bridges of Christian Contemporary Worship music get repeated, I suggest that worship leaders have a Rosary to count those repetitions.

I'm only half-joking here. How can we Evangelicals criticize the Rosary for being repetitive when we do the same thing with our praise choruses?

TMSR: Baseball Fever

Here is the follow-up to my rant about Promsie U. This time I will be talking about a kids musical that I was in when I was ten. It is called Sermon on the Mound and it was the first musical I had done. And of all the musicals aimed at kids under age twelve, this was one of the better ones.
         Sermon was written by Celeste and David T. Clydesdale and centers around the Eagles baseball team. They are finishing up spring training and the regular season starts that afternoon. Commenting on the action are sports casters Dizzy Deano and Jackie Rawlings*. The new rookie is a young man named Mac Wire. He is thrilled to be on a professional baseball team, but struggles with his confidence. As the story progresses he learns about putting on the Armor of God and leaning on Christ as his "Head Coach", and that the ones God chooses for His team are the ones who know they cannot do it on their own.

Unlike Promise U, Sermon on the Mound does a much better job both story-wise and with what it intends to accomplish. There are four reasons why I say this.

1) The songs fit the theme better and are integrated a little bit more.
     I counted at least three story songs in Sermon and they feel like real encouragement and not just empty platitudes. Some like "Playing Right Field" are sung by the characters themselves, others are sung by the chorus. But they are much more integrated into the theme and aren't just preachy. "If the LORD is our Head Coach" is a declaration of trust and "The LORD's Prayer" is sung by both the chorus and the team. They feel like part of the story. "The LORD's Prayer" segues beautifully into the song "Home Run", which is probably the tensest song in the whole show.

2) The characters feel real.
    For example, Mac Wire is excited to be playing his first major season game, but is also dubious as to whether or not he can do it. His character is very well fleshed out and I find him relatable even after eighteen years. The hot dog vendor is the one who gets to sing "Playing Right Field". He is one of the sorts of characters I love to see in a story; the working-class guy at a low-paying job who is very wise and encouraging. We get a few one-off guys like a lady named Ruth Babe and Assistant Coach Goodman. But even there, they're not just throwing platitudes, they still sound like people.

3) Character conversions are treated with respect.
    "Casey Back at Bat" may be one of the most blatant pieces of fan-fiction ever written, but it is also one of the best depictions of a changed life in any of these kids musicals. We learn that Casey's pride was what caused him to strike out not just once but twice, and evidently  his career suffered after that. Eventually he decided enough was enough and accepted Christ, and now he's making a comeback with the Eagles. He's even seen helping his teammate out. This isn't just a case of everything is hunk-dory, but an example of a changed life. And when you're writing Christian musicals for kids, this is absolutely critical.

4) The overall message is well-handled.
    Sermon's main theme is spiritual warfare using the analogy of a baseball game. Sure, the baseball uniform, glove and bat may be curious stand-ins for the Armor of God, but as a visual aid, it's not bad. In fact, Sermon treats the issue of spiritual warfare with surprising respect, and gives us the lesson that the best players are those who know that they cannot do anything without God's help, and spend the most time with their 'Head Coach". 

So I've shown what makes a Christian kids musical good and what makes it bad. To sum it up, the ones that are good are the ones that treat the chosen topic with respect, have a good story and characters, and make make sure the songs fit. The ones that suck are ones that have little to no story (or turn it boring), lame characters, and are both preachy and disrespectful of the chosen topic. Sermon of the Mound will always be better than Promise U. Although you could just do what Sister Wynona Carr did and just make one song about it.

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 *I don't know if that is a reference to either Jackie Robinson or J.K. Rowling. 

**Something I myself have only come to understand within the past decade.

TMSR: YOU KNOW NOTHING, VAL DICTORIAN!

I am going to rant now about a musical that I was in when I was eleven-years-old. Most people will not have heard about this one because it is written for kids who are either in home-school groups or big church groups.

This musical was written by Kathie Hill and is titled Promise U. Ms. Hill's work tends to be okay at best (at least from my own experience), and at worst it is simply glurge. And Promise U falls hard into that second category. What a piece of drek! There are five reasons why I say this:

1) The plot does not exist.
    The setting is at a college called Promise University and the whole student body has gathered for a pep rally/study hall Cram n Jam. They are learning about "Precious Promises to Famous Followers of the Past 2,000 Years" or P2F2P2K. Leading the group is the cocky DJ Stan "The Man" and a sexy nerd of a cheer captain Valarie Dictorian. They go through seven so-called Famous Followers, do a cheer after every song and it all culminates in Stan becoming a Christian with everything all hunk-dory at the end. 
    That's it, there's no conflict or anything. All it is is just talking about various people from history and a promise that applies to them. There's no beginning, no middle, and no real end either.

2) The characters are shallow.
     They are little more than cartoony mouthpieces uttering platitudes in stained glass attitudes. A new character comes in every time another "Famous Follower" (oh, give me a break!) is introduced. These characters are not really given a personality so much as they are given a quirk, and these quirks get old really fast. For example, Dee Caffeinate's only trait is her coffee obsession, and Val Dictorian comes off as a condescending know-nothing-know-it-all. 

3) The evangelism is all too easy. 
    Stan admits he's in over his head at the end, but it comes out of nowhere and doesn't feel real. All he has seen and heard was what everyone else was chanting. His character is so flat that I do not believe his life has been changed after accepted Christ. No one talks about dying to yourself and giving up whatever idols are in your life, something that is essential to the Christian life.

4) THE Promise is left out.
    The "Precious Promises" are true, but no mention is made at all of the promise that was made in Genesis Chapter 3 and continues through the end of Revelation; the promise of Christ's sacrifice and resurrection and the hope of eternal life with Him in Heaven. The promises are reduced to cutesy sentimentalism that do not require sacrifice of anything. This is a big "No" when writing Christian pieces. 

5) The Followers were treated without respect.
     If you're going to do a case-study of various Christians throughout history, then the topic needs to be treated seriously. This is not the case in Promise U, instead the Followers are treated with more sentimentality than respect. This is particularly bad with the case of Pocahontas. I'm not going to knock her faith just because it sounded it like the writer was merely speculating. But if she was in fact a strong woman of faith, then she needs more respect than just the Christian version of a Disney Princess!

 In short, Promise U was garbage. It is disrespectful towards Christians of the past, is insulting to kids' intelligence, and it had nothing to offer but preachy nonsense. 

THE GREAT DIVORCE: Number Three On My List Of Best Allegories Ever!

Ah, The Great Divorce; one of my favorite C.S. Lewis novels!  I have been reading it for the umpteenth time for the past week or so.  This story is one surreal adventure involving a bus that goes between Heaven and Hell.  The title is a reference to William Blake's The Marriage of Heaven and Hell.  Lewis is writing of their divorce, which makes sense as sin cannot exist in Heaven.  This novel shares a lot in common with Dante's La Divina Commedia, in particular the presence of a guide (in this case George MacDonald), how sin and salvation are represented allegorically, and a surreal setting. It shares a lot with John Bunyan's The Pilgrim's Progress (spoiler alert: in this case, it all being a dream).

 The story opens with the narrator standing in line at a bus stop at dusk in a miserable grey town where it is always raining.  The town goes on for miles on end and doesn't seem to stop.  The narrator gets on the bus and is taken to a spectacularly gorgeous natural landscape, but finds that he can't even so much as bend the grass.  In fact, it goes right through him and causes a lot of pain; he's a Ghost!  As is everyone who got off the bus.  There are radiant Solid People (most often called Shining Ones in the novel) coming to convert these souls, and one of them leads the narrator as he helps him understand the respective natures of Heaven and Hell.

One thing stands out is how so many of the Ghosts will not accept Joy because it means giving up their quirks, such as saying mean things to their loved ones or lording superiority over other people.  There is one character who always considered himself to be a good man and can't understand why a convicted murderer is in Heaven whereas he is not.  Another man used other people's pity as means to blackmail them in life and won't let go of that power in Heaven.  And a possessive mother will quite cheerfully drag her son to Hell to her if it means she will keep him.  They would much rather cling to their sins than accept God.  There's a lot of insight as to how sin works and how grace works, and how ultimately there are only two types of people in the world: those who submit to God and those who don't.  
      And there is also quite a lot of talk about how hard Heaven is to those who are not saved.  The Ghosts are insubstantial and just walking on the grass feels painful.  But they can become solid by accepting God's grace and letting it change them.  This is a very interesting concept.  

Read it.   

GENISIS: It's Not About The How, It's The Who

Ah, Genesis.  I don't think there's another book in the Bible that is so hotly (and unnecessarily) debated as this one is.  People argue about whether the Bible is talking about six literal days of creation or millions upon millions of years.  And meanwhile the whole point of Genesis gets trampled underfoot and completely ignored.  

Stop.  Just stop.  Back up and start over.  

What do we read when we first start Genesis chapter 1?  "In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth."  There.  It's right there in the first few words of the Bible.  "In the beginning, God...." it's right there in front of your nose.  God is in the beginning creation.  Continue reading and you see a pattern: And God said..., And God said..., And God said..., it's the same pattern.  It's all about God.  Read the Psalms; they talk a lot about praising God for what He has made.  "When I consider the work of Your hands...,"  that's what God want to hear.  

Reading about the Creation in the Bible should inspire praise to God.  The same goes for reading about the millions of years of Earth's geological history.  It's about who, not how. 




 

What Is The Purpose?

The Wisconsin State Journal ran an article last Sunday about a church on the South Side of Madison which is building a cultural center.  The idea is to bring people of other ethnic groups into the church and feel welcome.  

At first glance this sounds like a good idea.  However, as articles in the State Journal are notorious for leaving things out, it is not entirely clear to me what the purpose is in building this place and bringing in people from other ethnic groups.  They said that one of the missions was to "be a gathering place where we can learn about each other's cultures.  Fair enough.  

But it doesn't say anything about reaching out to people and telling them the Good News of Jesus Christ.  That might be the purpose, but there's no real indication that it is.  

The other possibility (and the one I unfortunately suspect to be the most likely), is that this church just wants to make their congregation more diverse.  They spoke of being a "neighborhood gathering place to bring various cultures together."  That alone is not enough reason to build a cultural center.


If the purpose of this place is to reach out to other ethnic groups in order to bring more people into the Family of God, by all means; build this cultural center.  Let people come and worship together and enjoy one another in Fellowship.  Let us meet with fellow brothers and sisters in Jesus and share God's love with other people.  The body of Christ is made up of people from every tribe, tongue, and nation the Bible tells us.  But if the purpose is to bring other cultures together for the sake of bringing other cultures together, forget it.  Don't build a cultural center.  If it is not specifically for reaching out to other people, then there is no point in building one of these places.   It's a church cultural center.  So what?  It's just a church cultural center.  That doesn't mean anything to a Christ Follower unless it has the purpose of bringing people to Christ.  


I'll agree with the pastor that there is a real problem with segregation.  It has always been an issue since our country was being formed.  But the purpose must be for the good of God's people instead of being just a cultural center that's part of a church.  And as followers of Christ, we don't want the latter.  
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UPDATE: It turns out that the church in question is one that my church is partnered with and the pastor is a very Godly man.  So this doesn't sound like a bad idea after all. It turns out that the pastor has been working hard in that community, and that if anyone is qualified for the job, he is.  We should still pray for this operation, and ask God to let it work the way He wants it to, so that it doesn't become like I often think it will. 

Christ+And = Heresy

Our church has been doing a sermon series called "Stronger Together", which is a lesson from the Book of Philippians in the Bible.  Saint Paul was writing to the church in Philippi while he was in prison.  Today, we studied the third chapter.  In this part of book, Paul warns the church about "evil men who are mutilators of the flesh".  The evil men he was talking about were a small group of people who were saying that faith in Christ wasn't enough.  If people wanted to really be saved, then they also had to adhere to Jewish law practices in general, and circumcision in specific.  These were the so-called Judaizers; a group of Jewish Christians.  Their attempts to make other converts strictly follow Jewish laws were undermining the church's mission to spread the Gospel.  This is a prime example of what we call Christ+And. 

There is only one appropriate thing to call people who preach Christ+And doctrines: Heretics.  These people try to undermine the church's mission by saying a true Christian must also follow this set of rules because Christ isn't enough.  The point is that Christ is enough.  Now, faith in Christ should manifest itself as good works, but our confidence should not be in those good works.  The Bible says that no matter how hard we try, we can never be good enough because we are sinners.  As Christians, our confidence should be in Christ alone. 

Whenever we say that people must follow Christ and our rules, we are not preaching the good news; we are preaching heresy.  And heresy is one of the biggest threats not only to Christian unity, but also to the mission Christ calls us to.  Heresy leads not only to the exclusion of people, but it also turns people off to the Gospel.  And heretics make other Christians look bad. 

Christ+And is also found in legalism.  Legalism says that people must adhere to strict rules on modesty and only indulge in approved forms of entertainment.  Granted a lot popular culture in our day and age is junk, but nevertheless, legalism alienates people from the Gospel.  It doesn't have be heresy, but it often is. 

So what should we do as Christians—or more appropriately, should I say, Christ Followers?  We should manifest our faith as good deeds, but we shouldn't let them become what we put our trust in.  And we should be on our guard for the heretics who preach Christ+And.  Jesus said," By their fruits you will know them."  Actions speak louder than words.  People who preach Christ+And exclude people and often form something akin to, if not really, a cult.  And cultists are heretics.  In fact, Christ+And IS heresy.  Merely calling it lies is putting it too mildly. 

Christian Bookstore Weirdness

I had to get a pair of shoes for working in the Culinary Arts kitchen at MATC.  It turns out that the shoe store my dad and I went to on the East Side of Madison is right next to a so-called Christian bookstore.  So when we finished my errand (it took about fifteen minutes to do so), we went to the bookstore for a little while.  Unfortunately, merely sticking a Christian label on something doesn't automatically make it Christian.  If I may quote Abraham Lincoln on the subject, "If you call the tail a leg, how many legs does a cat have?  Four; just because you call the tail a leg does not make it one."  Likewise, calling something Christian that looks like it doesn't necessarily make it such.  
 While I like this particular bookstore's plain Bibles and greeting cards (the cards with the sheep theme are my favorite), their book and music selection leaves a lot to be desired.  I'm going to explain why I say this, although I'll leave out the children's stuff because I didn't look in that spot. 

Some of their Bibles looked a little odd.  I found one that was apparently aimed at girls under the age of seventeen.  It hand sequins and beads on the cover.  While I like those sorts of sparkly things, I don't like them being used to decorate a Bible.  First off, it makes Christianity look cute and fuzzy (which it is not), and number two, if you're going to decorate a Bible, why not use the old Medieval illuminated style?  It may look pretty, but a lot of illuminated scripts tackle such painful issues such as Punishment and Hell. 

The music selection is ridiculous.  It is all contemporary; no Bach cantatas, no Mendelssohn's Elijah, no sacred works by Handel or Beethoven, no Verdi's Requiem, no Vivaldi's Gloria, not even anything by John Rutter.  Don't get me wrong; a lot of contemporary Christian music is great (I myself happen to be a fan of the Newsboys and some of Casting Crowns songs), but a lot of Classical Music is sacred works.  In fact, for many years and particularly during the Renaissance and Baroque periods, most of the music written was for church/mass.  Why not sell recordings of some of the older stuff?  There was also no Michael Card music.  Michael Card, the Christian singer that I grew up listening to, who wrote mostly his own original tunes, and who never glossed over anything about the Bible: Listen to his song The Basin and the Towel.  This was the second tune of his that I heard (The first one was "Poem of Your Life".  I first heard both when I was a little girl).

Their video selection was—to put it mildly—dumb.  While I haven't seen most of the movies they had on sale, there was a DVD set of movies about the Apocalypse.  If there was ever a subject that people couldn't be more annoyingly presumptuous about, it's this.  I first saw a film about it when I was in eighth grade.  It was so ridden with glitches I have refused to watch another video on the subject.  The Bible clearly says that we don't know the day or the hour, or even so much as to how it will precisely occur.

Their book selections are the worst.  Most of the books were feel-good, happy-perky, stego-brained glop.  Books with titles like Get Out of the Pit, Good-Bye Insecurity, etc..  No Pilgrims Progress, no Beyond the Gates of Splendor, no Let the Little Children Come, nothing about how Christians suffered for the LORD.  Whenever it wasn't feel-good dumbness, it was God-Wants-You-To-Always-Be-Happy heresy.  And I mean heresy.  My dad spoke of this one "preacher"man whose books were being sold at this bookstore.  There was a passing reference to salvation in it, but nothing about sacrifice or the cross.  This man, who preaches only feel-good stuff, is a heretic.  There was a book called Prayers that Activate Blessings.  Just by reading the title I can tell that this is something that would make even my Pentecostal best friend Stiffelio roll his eyes.  The whole idea that following Christ would result in only happiness for a person and never suffering completely ignores the fact that Jesus said that we must deny ourselves and take up our crosses every day.  It's not pleasant, and crucifixion was hellish way to die, but Jesus said that we must be willing to suffer for the faith.  I struggle with the concept myself, but I can't argue with it.

So to the owner of the Christian bookstore on the East Side of Madison I say this: Cut out the con job.  Start selling the real serious stuff and no more of the How-To-Live-A-Happy-Life stupidity.  That is, quit telling people that the Christian life is a soft fluffy pillow and start teaching about how to really live for God.  And while you're at it, can you also start selling Dante's The Divine Comedy?  People should really start learning about what sin looks like to God.

Greek Fest: Church and Icons

There is a church just off of Highway 151.  It is Assumption Greek Orthodox Church and it is lovely.  It was founded by Greek immigrants who settled in Madison, so the congregation is very fond of the heritage.  Every summer they hold a small two-day fair called Greek Fest.  Mostly what it consists of is Greek food, music, and a tour of the sanctuary (just decorated with icons).  It's small, but awesome.

I shared a plate of various Greek foods with my dad and little brother.  This sampler included meatballs, a cheese phylo, a spinach pie, dolmades (stuffed grape leaves), shish-kabob, and bread, plus some loukoumades (Greek honey puffs).  We ate our lunch outside, so we were able to listen to some Greek music (while trying to ignore the unbearable heat). 

The Eastern Orthodox denomination holds a unique place in Christian history.  Unlike the western church which changed considerably over the past several centuries, the Eastern Orthodox church has remained relatively unchanged in terms of art and tradition.

This denomination places a huge emphasis on icons.  In fact, the artist who painted the icons in the church still has a few more to paint.  I can't list all the icons in the church, but I'll try to name a few. 

Pictured in the Pendentives (four triangles surrounding the dome), are the Four Gospel Writers: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.  Each of them is shown in a sort of study where they are writing their gospels.

There are many icons along the walls of the sanctuary (Saints Anne, Paraskevi, and Theadore Tyron to name a few).  These icons are on either side of the pews.  Back in Europe, the church sanctuary is standing room only.  Here, they put in pews so that people can sit down, which is logical considering that the average Orthodox liturgy can last for more than an hour (I'm understating the case here because some liturgies go for six hours!). 

The dome icons consist of important figures from the Old Testament (Noah, Abraham, Sarah, and King David being a few of them).  The icon at the top of the inside of the dome itself portrays Jesus.  Apparently the dome is supposed to represent Heaven (hence why Jesus is shown at the top).

The icons surrounding the alter are the ones that really hold your attention.  The icon you first notice when you walk in the door of the sanctuary is the one of the Virgin Mary, her title in this church being "Mother of God".  However, as much as she's called "the bridge between Heaven and Earth, Mary does not hold the same position in the Orthodox church as she does in the Catholic church.  She is seen as one of us; a human being with flaws.  She is portrayed holding the infant Christ and her halo is made of gold leaf.  In front of her icon is a Eastern style crucifix. 

I recommend Greek Fest for anyone who wants to find something to do at the end of July in Madison.  It's got great food, music, and church history.

Sermon on Esther

The sermon tonight was on the first two chapters in the book of Esther.  The point of the message was that God is always at work.

Before we meet Esther, Vashti is queen.  The king throws a huge party just to show off how powerful and rich he is.  He displays his splendor throughout the whole empire.  While he is drunk, he calls for Vashti, who refuses to come.  The king gets angry and kicks her out of the palace forever.  What is God doing through all of this?
When we first meet Esther, she is an orphan who has been raised by her older cousin, Mordecai, the man who sits at the king's gate.  She is among many young girls selected to come before the king.  She spends a year in beauty treatments, and then is called before the king.  When the king sees her he loves her more that the other women.  He marries her and makes her queen.  What is God doing in through all of this? 

What's most important is that God works in many ways.  Sometimes it's through miracles, more often it's more subtle and harder to notice.  But God's purpose is not to entertain us.  His purpose is to work in us, through us, and for us, and that requires faith.  And faith is not about waiting for a big flash-and-bang miracle to solve our problems.  It's about trusting God to know what He's doing, and to do what He says and to follow him.