There are no steroids in baseball; just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.
Chuck Norris doesn't divide by zero — Zero divides by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming "Law and Order" are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Before the Boogieman goes to bed, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter; he roundhouse-kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
Bruce Lee was the only person in the world who could defeat Chuck Norris. Now that Bruce is dead, Chuck Norris is invincible.*
Superman and Chuck Norris once made a bet. The loser had to wear his undies on the outside for the rest his career. Guess who won?
Superman owns a set of Chuck Norris pajamas.
They tried to put Chuck Norris on Mt. Rushmore, but the granite wasn't strong enough for his beard.
When Chuck Norris does push-ups he doesn't push himself up; he pushes the world down.
Chuck Norris was once bitten by a viper. After hours of searing agony, the viper died.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming "Law and Order" are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
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*My own original Chuck Norris joke.
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